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Acen Coordinates (working plan)

Outfit One (Punk Lolita):
Blue Trump Carnivale OP
Hipster Glasses
Black bob
Engineer boots
Dot tulle half-gloves
Vertical stripped stockings
Many, many strings of white pearls/white beads
Maybe: Studded cropped vest


Outfit Two (Dolly Kei x Lolita):
Milk Tea embroidery JSK
Black Corset
Black Tulle skirt (short)
Beige and pink floral chiffon skirt
Fox stole
Creme roses
Brown leather satchel
Leather waist belt (maybe straw waist belt)
floral stockings or maybe beige stockings
Victorian boots
Kid gloves - black
gold/brass jewelry
Pin curls

..... more later

Thinking about Acen

I only have a few weeks of school left, which means I have begun thinking about my Acen plans to distract me from other stuff. I really wish I knew when the fashion show was going to be on Saturday, because I am definitely going to try to go to Warrior Tag. It's going to be the most epic thing ever, and I do not want to miss it. I might have to show up late, depending on when the fashion show is, but I want to go regardless! I need to decide what I'm going to wear, though I have a few ideas already.

I am starting to think about my coordinates for acen. Last year I wore sweet the whole weekend... but this year I'm much more into classic/morigirl/dollykei/naturalkei. I've considered not wearing lolita at all, in favor of representing these other Japanese fashions that might be less represented.

What's everyone else planning on wearing?

Also... on another note, I'm probably not going to be able to attend the swap meet, but I had things I wanted to potentially trade/sell. If someone wants to go as my emmisary, I'm looking for mostly classic/gothic stuff, and to phase out some of my sweet. Maybe said emmisary could photomessage me things for trade on my phone? I have to leave super early Sunday to go to my brother's graduation.

Fantasic Dress Dilema...

I am really really tempted to buy the Fantasic Dolly replica. I am against replicas as much as the next lolita, and maybe more as an artist and craftsman myself... but the chances of getting my hands on the red or lavender OP are looking slimmer everyday. I've wanted it since it came out and tried really hard to get it on release, and there it is staring me in the face in a slightly shittier incarnation for 60$. I'm poorer than I have been for a while, and I could rat around on my bike in a replica and not feel too guilty. I don't know, friends list. I would feel like a total hypocrite...

Things on my mind...

1. I have no idea what all this dramu is about the tea party... I hope its resolved now, but people seem to be still talking about it, and I feel very out of the loop. It bothers me that its happening at all, to my friends, and the Chicago community in general, which used to be awesome and drama-free. And it bothers me that I don't know what's going on. It makes me feel very sad, and kind of responsible, even though the latter is probably irrational.

2. I cannot concentrate at all on this paper I'm supposed to be writing. Paper(s) actually, though I can't find my prompt for one, so I'm just concentrating on the first one. I feel like this for all my classwork right now actually. I'm having a hard time keeping everything organized and finding the motivation to go beyond "just getting it done". This is also the reason I haven't done *any* work on my independent study, besides think a lot about it. That and money... which I guess I will talk about next.

3. I'm so. Damn. Broke. My friend from the Netherlands is here, and he wants to go out and do things, and drink and go to eat, and I have a bit of money to spend now, but honestly, I don't even know if I'm going to be able to make rent at the end of the month. I have to keep asking my parents for money, which really is an awful feeling. I've been very good about not buying things that are superfluous, and I still don't have any money. Something weird is happening with payroll at school, so I haven't been payed for *any* of my hours this semester. I called Qedda or whatever that lady's name is... but she never got back to me. I guess I need to call her back, because I really need to get paid for working. Even if I'm only working a few hours a week. I feel like I should get another job, but I really don't have time. I've been doing a lot more social things lately, which I guess I could sacrifice to work more, but I feel like those things are important too. Maybe even more so right now.

4. I'm stressed out about the whole Japan situation. Yes, because of everything that affects them, but also because it's caused my study trip to get cancelled. I needed those credits to satisfy graduation requirements and set me on track for next year, so I can graduate in the spring when I'm supposed to. I'm trying to work out an alternative plan to earn those credits anyway, but it's going to be difficult, and the classes I need aren't being offered on campus this summer. I'm worried because of this I'm not going to graduate on time... which I really really don't want. I feel very done with school right now. I suppose this is normal... I began to feel this way hardcore about the same time my Junior year of highschool... I just want to move on with life. At the same time, though, I *don't* want to graduate, because that means real life. Finding a real job, potentially moving to another city, the reality of student loans, thinking about graduate school, probably being even poorer than I am now. It hit me last week I don't have documentation of *any* of my work... most of it anyway. I don't have a website, or a complete / professional resume. I should be good at this stuff, or at least on top of it, since that is my job. I've contacted people to help me take photos and things, but no one has gotten back to me. Which leads me back to the summer conundrum. I want to work at the museum again, but I have gotten no response to any of the emails I've sent. I know they want to have me back, or thats what they said to me before, but its frustrating since I haven't heard anything. I'm thinking about taking a class at OxBow... which would be really fun, and knock off a straggling studio credit. I need to decide what I want to write my thesis about next year. I need to do so much.... Gah, crunch time.

4. I need to find a new place to live. With roomates. In a month, or less. I want to live in Logan Square, though anywhere close to the train would be alright.

5. On the bright side of life right now, I have the best boyfriend, ever. Just saying. I was going to write more about that, but I just stressed myself out more instead. Its weird... recently, whenever I'm by myself I start feeling really really anxious. I don't like it.

Tags:

Miscellanious

I had a really good time at Alice's gingerbread meet yesterday. Its been too long since I was able to smile and laugh and genuinely have fun.

I'm not feeling quite as well today unfortunately. My mom called me today with my friend's obituary in the paper, and reading it brought the sadness back. Even though we weren't that close, especially in recent years, his suicide brought on a lot of complicated emotions and its been really hard to deal with. That on top of school stress, work stuff, and this unending drama with kaj, I have not been a very happy camper.

I really miss wearing gothic. I wore a more gothy coordinate than usual yesterday to the meet and I really liked the way I looked. I think I may sell some of my sweeter wardrobe and purchase a few more nice black things. I need a velvet dress, and I would like some sort of gothy print. I've been having dress fantasies about the JetJ Crucifixion dress in wine... controversial but so lovely! Classic/gothic is so much more expensive than sweet and something in me feels a little guilty buying plain black dresses because I feel like I could make them, even though I never have the time to, and I enjoy wearing things I didn't make much more. I don't really have the funds right now to be buying superfluous dresses, so I suppose it will be a distant fantasy, but maybe someday.

100 q meme

) Full Name: Barbara Lynn Little

2) Male/Female: Female

3) Were you named after anyone?: No, my parents just thought it was a "happy name". My middle name is taken after my mother's sister.

4) Does your name mean anything?: Same root as the word Barbarian. Comes from Greek. As a name it means mysterious and enigmatic, yet intriguing. Literally beautiful stranger. I think it suits my quiet personality well :)

5) Nick Name(s): Barb I suppose... a few people have called me Barbie, but I have never liked it much... Boba in high school for a while from a few, Ra also from a few but its worn off. I like it when people call me by my full name, but only my mother, and on rare occasion Benjamin, do that.

6) Who do you think you look like: People have told me I look like Rene Zellweger if she was less blonde, but I dont know if I see the resemblance. I just think I look German.

7) Date Of Birth: New Years Day.

8) Place of Birth and Current Location: New York State, currently living in Chicago

9) Nationality: American. Background: Scottish, English, German, Swiss

10) Astrology Sign: Capricorn

11) Chinese Astrology Sign: Snake

12) Religion: Agnostic

13) What’s your favorite smell?: fresh roses, rain, autumn, boy smell

14) Political Position?: subjectively moderate

15) What do you prefer to drink in the morning?: Tea? Coffee?

16) Hair + Eye color: Basic brown. I dye it a darker shade. My eyes are always a very icy dark blue when my pupils aren't huge.

17) Do you look like anyone famous?: no i dont think so

18) What do you look like?: Ehhhhhhh a lolita?

19) Any unusual talents?: I'm a fairly good artist. I don't know how unusual that is. I also have balanced a spoon on my nose for 30 minutes....

20) Rightly, Lefty, or Ambidextrous?: right

21) Gay, Straight, Bi, or Other?: Straight mostly.

22) What do you do for a living?: school. I also work in career planning... But mostly make art. Though it doesnt bring in money, it absorbs most of my energy.

23) What do you do for fun?: Watch and make film. Fashion and lolita. Sew stuff.

24) What are your favorite art materials to work with?: Found materials. Textile stuff mostly. Various flora... wire, plastics, plaster.

25) What kind of materials would you like to work with?: Currently exploring the wonders that are thermoplastics.

26) Have you met your grandparents?: Yup

27) Boyfriend / Girlfriend: Yes

28) Crush: thankfully fading.

29) What celebrity would you date if you could?: Lee Pace <3

30) Current worries?: money, school, what will happen when im done with school in too soon a time. Grad school. My relationship to a certain extent but that seems to be working itself out.

31) Favorite online Guy/Girl(s): Girls: um... there are quite a few lolitas i really love, but i dont know their lj names... Basje because I adore her posts and photos, even though I rarely post on her journal. Boys: Jochem but I suppose he's not an internet friend anymore since I've hung out with him in real life... I think BoyKitten is amazingly fabulous. I wish he posted more. And that one brolita whos much prettier than me.

32) Favorite place to be?: crooked lake stargazing in the cold with Benn :), I also adore the European countryside. I wish I could always be there. Any sort of fabulous garden, or any sort of fabulous cafe/patisserie.

33) Least favorite place to be?: grumpy on the el in the morning.

34) Do you burn or tan?: BURN :(

35) Ever break a bone?: never

36) What is your favorite cereal?: count chocula. Motherfuckers.

37) Person you cry with: I prefir to cry alone. Ben always tries to get me to stop...

Do You Have...

38) Any sisters: nope

39) Any brothers: 1 biological, 3 by.... relation

40) Any pets: 2 cats, a dog with my parents. I did have another dog but she passed away this summer :(
she was the best

41) An Illness: I have a wicked cold + jetlaggggggg

42) A Pager: What?

43) A Personal phone line: hahaha

44) A Cell phone: YUP

45) A visible birthmark: No

46) A Pool or hot tub: I don't own either

47) A Car: no

Describe Your...

48) Personality: Quiet i guess. Cold at times, passionate at others. Probably very foolish and arrogant. Creative and curious. Mostly intellectual. I try to be kind and polite to the people I care about, and most people that I don't.

49) Driving: normal?

50) Your clothing style: Lazy art kid with a touch of romanticism. Fashiony when I feel like it. I dress in extremes.

51) Room: white and messy. Decorating needs to happen in this apartment. And purging.


52) What’s missing:


53) School: School of the Art Institute

54) Bed: white frame, curretly white and navy striped sheets.

55) Relationship with your parent(s): great


56) Do you believe in yourself: mostly

57) Do you believe in love at first sight?: eh...


58) Consider yourself a good listener: I try to be.


59) Have a future dream that you would like to share?: I really want to work at Angels in London.


60) Get Along with your parents: Wasn't this asked? Yes.

61) Save your e-mail conversations: Automatic these days :P

62) Pray: only when desperate

63) Believe in reincarnation: i dont know

64) Brush your teeth twice a day?: nah, just once


65) Like to talk on the phone: no. I really dislike it.


66) Like to eat?: when the food is good, then immensely!


67) Like to exercise?: no D:


68) Like to watch sports?: no D: D:

69) Sing in the car?: yes definately


70) What is a dream that you have all the time?: I have flying dreams in large numbers, though I havent had many lately. I've had a lot of nightmares involving snakes lately.


71) Dream in color: Yes. I dont know anyone who doesn't?


72) Do you have nightmares?: yeah, uncomfortably frequently


73) Sleep with a stuffed animal: no, I have a boy instead.


74) Right next to you: cats


75) On your favorite coffee cup?: my Dalek mug

76) On your mouse pad: geez this is old...

77) favorite flavor of gum?: gum is gross.

78) Your brand of deodorant?: uh... the purple kind.

79) Your dream honeymoon spot: cottage in the english or french countryside :)

80) Your dream husband/wife: Someone like a more mature Benjamin. He can stick around and we'll see :)

81) Hiding in your closet?: expensive baroque molding I bought and havent used...

83) The name of one of your closest/best friends?: Elissa

84) Your bad time of the day: waking up

85) Your worst fear(s): ... mmmmm

86) What's the weather like: cold

87) Your favorite time of year?: oh i dont know times when im not too stressed to enjoy the weather.


88) Your favorite holiday?: of the traditional ones? Halloween. I do like Christmas, but only the family tradtions and things. I dont like all of the bad music. I do like the cookies.


89) A material weakness?: clothes. Expensive clothes. I'm really glad I didn't drop 700 euros on that jacket I really wanted though... I also really love good food. While I didn't buy the Junya Watanabe jacket, I instead went and bought a 75 euro meal >.<


90) The weirdest food or drink that you like: er... I dont know if anything I eat regularly is that werid. Ive tried some really strange things. In Italy I ate a lard sandwich that was amazingly delicious, but desrcibing it makes me want to vomit. I dont know when the next time I'll eat one is though.


91) At the top of your "to-do list"?: Uhhh pay my phone bill?

92) The hardest thing about growing up: working.

93) A pet peeve?: tennis shoes with skirts. Drives me nuts.

94) Your scariest moment: I really really thought I was pregnant with Kaj's child. That was awful.

95) Your attitude about love?: wonderful, though not as exclusive as people think it is.


96) The funniest or most desperate thing you've done to get the attention of the opposite sex?: oh jees, the things I've done to impress/get the attention of boys have been very desperate, though not funny at all. I wont repeat them in this survey as some of them rate on the list of things I've done that make me lean towards suicide or catatonia.

97) The worst feeling in the world: ... Illness to make things easy.

98) The best feeling in the world: Complete satisfaction. To lack wanting in anyway. Mundane Nirvana.


99) Who sent this to you?: No one

100) Four to six people you tag: .....